Jeremy Clarkson: Top Gear have # 39 problems; more # 39; BBC News
Human quotes above himself, brace yourself for total non compliance PC as Jeremy let rip with some of the best quotes of Top Gear collected his column in The Sun and various other sources.
Quote We all know that small cars are good for us, but so is the cod liver oil and jogging Speed has never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary while is what you get j ' have seen better look gangrenous wounds that Clarkson on the Porsche Cayenne referring to the Porsche Cayenne takes 0-60 5 and a half seconds and about 17 gallons of fuel now we have been told in this new series, we had to introduce greener cars so here is a s It really is the greenest car that we could find, really light green Lamborghini Murcielago now, we get lots of complaints that we do enough affordable cars has t on the show, so we're kick off tonight with the cheapest of all Ferrari a Ferrari F430 at the beginning of Top Gear season November 2005, after a teaser with dozens of supercars welcome you a Greenpeace rbo, exhaust gases pass into the turbocharger and spin it, with a compressor, the air goes in witchcraft happens and you go faster This is the last class S now available with a highly economical twin-turbo six I n liters economic means I This is the wrong word I apologize, we lost your night, no good Korean cars or Malaysia you know that s the caravan nineteenth we destroyed the program 12 months If I had to nitpick, and obviously I'm doing right now, the Germans roll propably around on the floor laughing so Ze Tommies did ein car spit und kleenex, zhey will be crushed MG SV prototype Test Possessing a TVR in the past was like owning a bear, i mean it was great, until he pulled your head, it would be one day, he would pull your head in ancient times I always had the impression that TVR built a car for sale, then discovered how he treated in general, when one of their customers wrote to the factory complaining about how dead he was Supercars are supposed to work on Arthur Scargill then run over him again for good measure, they are designed to melt ice caps, kill the poor, poison the water tab, destroy the ozone layer, decimate indigenous wildlife, recapture the Falkland islands and turn all of the third world into a huge desert uninhabitable, notched all before all the oil in the world which means a Range Rover, doing 10,000 miles per year, produces less pollution per day a cow farting while discussing about methane as a global warming agent the only reason someone bought the old Land Rover Discovery was because they could not afford a Range Rover accordingly, it weighs 7 February tonnnes - and that E makes heavier than a Rolls-Royce Phantom is so heavy that if you were to load things, then attach a trailer to the back; technically you need a license VUL It really is as useful as a snooze button on a smoke detector As for the adjustable suspension in the Bentley Continental GT Top Gear Bloopers I just realized something, is late and I am not in Top Gear Bloopers intoxicated Who decided to Nazi alarm Route Marching Top Gear Bloopers current car Off you come to Top Gear again Morons on the Audi R8 driving most supercars is like trying to manhandle a cow stairs backwards, but it's like smearing honey on Keira Knightley, I like to consider Ferrari as a smaller version of the Ferrari 355 God is like a quail egg dipped in salt celery and served in Julia Roberts belly button on the Alfa Romeo Brera Think like Angelina Jolie you heard it's crazy and eats only wallpaper paste but you, would not you s ur Brera again mention a version with a slow 0-60mph time and a big price tag as is Cameron Diaz you know she Sá vegetarian, you know she's Commited eco mentalist you not say the car is like Cameron Diaz, with wheels the Caterham can have 250 bhp, but it must be remembered that weighs about the same as j canvas We start tonight with the highlight of my childhood is the Ladybird book of Motorcars from 1963, and as you can imagine, is full of rubbish really just endless boring gray shapes, until you get to page 40, where you will find the Maserati 3500 GT now for me, when I was little, was like kind of Jordan and Cameron Diaz in a bath together with a Lightning jet fighter and lots of jelly If this car was a breakfast would be cornflakes on toast Mercedes CLS55 AMG on it sounds like Barry White wasps eat Aston Martin DB9 which is not really a race car, which is just pornography that led Ariel Atom Nirvana you can forget everything you've ever driven, while there is no car, nothing on four wheels, is as fast as this core the hardest BMW M3 CSL ever made about the Ferrari F40 and what I like is tha t when you are on the current term, and you take your foot off the accelerator, hear it are these huge bounces just large landfills bundles unburned fuel in the exhaust for FUN test driving a Bentley Turbo through a rubber smoke cloud is like Blenheim Palace on wheels Aston Martin V8 Vantage Roadster I prefer to be in that Keira Knightley in the BMW X3 If you are clinically insane, i mean you wake up in the morning and you think you're an onion, this is your car Overfinch what did with the old Range Rover was to replaceJune 4-liter engine with a 5-7 liter V8 Corvette and it is in a car that weighs nearly 2 tons If your name is BP Esso McShell Telling people at a dinner party you drive a Nissan Almera is tell them that you got the Ebola virus and you're about to sneeze old DB7, which was just a slip in Jag XJS was a frock in a party the Aston Martin DB9 is completely different No, no not There s no such thing as cheap and gay is cheap and cheap and cheerful wicked referring to Proton Savvy I prefer to work on my hands and knees than drive there in a Ford Galaxy; Whoever designed the Ford Galaxy upholstery had a cauliflower fixation; I would rather have a vasectomy than buy a Ford Galaxy not only avoid the Suzuki Wagon R You avoid as you avoid unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite about Ford GT40 Was it the greatest hypercar all well, this question of his I've never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall and I'm not racing cars that have been converted for road use never work really is like a hard core adult film, then the change so it can be shown in British hotels You end up with a sort of half-hour of sweaty faces of some bloke on cars to Max Power show most of these cars will be 0-60 once, then they'll jump what the Morris Marina compete against walking off the bus to decide which is worse Allegro Austin or Morris Marina, is like deciding what j ambe you prefer to have amputated Ford Escort It's powered by engines so rude, even Moulinex wouldn t use them whenever I'm suffering from insomnia, I Just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I'm out generally right, a Range Rover would be whisked away by the lights diesel wheelbarrow on the V6 Renault Clio I think the problem is that he is French's surrender monkey Volkswagen it costs 200 pounds to buy a set of four injectors fuel for the diesel Golf Kia could propably make two or three cars that's when I caught you dawdle at intersections, this is for every time I took you to 4 miles per hour in a highway this is PAYBACK TIME Clarkson yells at a Volvo 340 seconds before putting it in a grinder this is a Renault Espace, probably the best people carriers not that it's much to shout about That as to say Oh well, I got syphilis, the best of sexually transmitted diseases that the carriage turning circle is tighter than Thrifty McThrift book tighten their belts for boys about the Chevrolet Corvette Z06 in many ways then this car is like herpes Grand catch the fun but not so much fun to live with every day on the McLaren F1 in his film, the most extravagant I respect enormously, in the same way as I respected my old head master but we did not become friends on a Buick LeSabre There was zero when it was new, it was built by idiots, and it's garbage now on an Audi RS4 convertible the only person who looked good in a 4 convertible sitting was Adolf Hitler on the development of the Golf GTI MkI between MkIV and I voted for it as the greatest car of the 20th century over the years, however, the Golf GTI became p read large and fatter and slower Think like Elvis Presley began all athletic and full of vigor, and wound up on the toilet, a huge, dribbling hulk About James May Why are you on this program About Jade Goody a racist waste, facing pork blood and organs About Lethal Bizzle it for his actions as the one that killed Top of the Pops in the first place, they kept booking acts like it's his name Jizzy Lewis Hamilton fabric price NTA and if you see Fernando Alonso again, tell her his eyebrows are too big a cyclist riding past in Oxford the thing is, here - Oi have you seen that I damn near knocked down by a cyclist About people Chinese do not have the souls of his column in the Sun newspaper about Drummers Drummers are like houseflies they're born, they make a sound, and then they die of his column in the Sun newspaper.
Jeremy Clarkson of Top Gear, Jeremy Clarkson, speed.