Top 10 Funniest Car Commercial Compilation
Welcome to this great page filled with automotive thinking how funny car jokes are important to the Western lifestyle, the amount of jokes and good jokes driving is relatively low - there are not everything a lot; and they're not all that funny.
The only thing wrong with a perfect player for the work you find yourself at work.
Nobody knows exactly how many cars there are in the world, in total but estimates say that there are between 800 million and one billion passenger cars and light commercial vehicles on the roads worldwide a number that actually increases rather quickly because more cars arrive quickly in India and Asia, particularly China.
Good thing, then, is that the auto industry is slowly moving hybrid cars and hydrogen cars with a much better carbon footprint.
These can be pretty cool, too, you know just look at it.
Anyway, we want to entertain you as best we can, if we went though a lot of jokes about driving and automotive jokes and find the best.
This page shows our selection of automotive humor best and most entertaining as we know.
Great Jokes Jokes funny car driving Eddie shouts.
Eddie was driving on the road and met a car coming the other way.
Although there is room to pass easily, Eddie has forced the car from the opposite direction to slow down and rolled on his window and yelled pork.
Surprised, the other driver looked in his rearview mirror and vowed to Eddie.
Well, there you go not everyone has your best interests at heart and sometimes worse, when you help people your help is what is in trouble.
Jokes about Cars What you learn when driving.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
What do you get when you put a car and a pet together.
What†s the difference between a Hummer and a hedgehog.
Well, with the hedgehog the pricks are on the outside.
Okay, so not all the jokes here are what we could call clean jokes.
In the absence of this, here is the latest of these short funny jokes - a kind of cleaning joke.
What is the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner.
With a vacuum cleaner, the dust bag is inside.
And while we're at it, here's another couple of very funny jokes that just aren t very funny own jokes.
A family of three are behind a truck wheel bin when a dildo flies and hits against the windshield.
Embarrassed, and save his young son's innocence, the mother turned and said.
Which one of the boys answers Was it Wow, I'm not surprised that he could emerge with a cock like that.
Automotive Humor and Fun Car Amusing Wise 4-Year-Old.
One day a guy was driving with her 4 year old daughter in the truck and honked his car horn by mistake.
She immediately turned and looked at him with a look expectantly on his face.
Seeing his eyes on him he said, I did it by accident.
The girl said: Because you say n t after ASSHOLE.
So far, we present you with most short jokes about driving.
However, automotive humor is diverse, and not all our car jokes are short; some of our jokes are driving long very funny jokes.
Some automobile jokes more we are about to present might even make you think a bit - which is quite useless, of course.
A blonde goes into a bank in the central New York city and ask the loan officer She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow 5000.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce car is parked in the street in front of the bank; it has the title and everything checks out.
The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan the bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a 250,000 Rolls as collateral against a loan 5000 A bank employee then performed drive the Rolls into the bank and underground car parks there.
Two weeks later, the blond return, refund the 5000 and the interest that comes 15 41 The loan officer said, Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked very well, but we are a little puzzled While you were away, we checked and found that you are a multimillionaire what we riddles, why would you bother to borrow 5000.
The blonde replies, Where New York downtown can I park my Rolls for two weeks for only 15 41 and expect it to be there when I return.
Mom and Dad had given their teenage daughter, Joan, family car privileges.
The following Saturday Joan was allowed to take the car to a party, and in addition to the usual don t be home too late admonitions she had been given a gift about t drink and drive.
Joan was a reasonable girl Saturday night she stayed away from alcohol, but had fun anyway a lot of fun.
The next morning his father came out at the entrance to get the newspaper and returned to the house, frowning.
At 11 h 30, the girl walked sleepily into the kitchen, and his father asked him, darling, what time did you last night.
Not too late, my father, she replied, perhaps a little nervous.
Dead-pan, his father said, then, my precious one, I will certainly talk to the Paperboy not to place my morning paper under the tire of the car.
An Irish priest and a rabbi enter a car crash They both go out of their cars and stumble on the side of the road looks Rabbi cars smashed and said, Oy Vey What shipwreck, wreck.
The priest pulls a flask of whiskey from his coat and said, Here, drink some of this it will calm your nerves The rabbi takes a swig and shakes his head sadly, still looking cars, they are severely damaged Oh, but it will sooo expensive, he said.
Yeah, well, it's just the money, Rabbi Have another swig; in fact, you can drink the whole bottle if you wish.
The rabbi nods and drink most of the bottle, never taking his eyes broken cars Then he turned to the priest and said, What do we say to the police.
Well, the priest says, I do not know what you will be telling them But I'll be telling them that I was not a drink.
Good to know that some people use there their brains while driving and crashing.
Here's another that could fall under car jokes about driving, but really, it's just a joke on cars at all, it is those who sometimes funny, and most of the time not so jokes funny barbie.
One day a guy was driving home when he realized it was his daughter's birthday, and - or expensive - it hadn t bought anything for her so he pulls into the parking lot next mall happening, is a toy store and request a Barbie doll for my daughter.
The seller looks a slightly patronizing way and demand, well sir, that Barbie would it.
The man looked surprised if the wizard continues, we Barbie goes to the ball 19 99, Barbie went shopping to 19 99 to 19 Barbie Goes Clubbing 99 Barbie goes to the gym 19 99, Internet Barbie 19 Barbie 99 and divorced at 99 249.
Man can not help and asks, Why Barbie divorced 99 249 when all other Barbies are selling 19 99.
Well sir, that is quite obvious the assistant said, Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house, Ken's Furniture, Ken's car.
While doing research on cars, jokes jokes and humor transportation truck to this page, we met another one of those short jokes that compare things or people to other things.
We could have put up with the other short funny car jokes, but why not put here just for fun, what with the change being the spice of life and all that.
What is the difference between an automobile insurance company and a Mafia don.
A car insurance company can tell you how many people will die this year, but a mob boss, well, it can also tell each of their names.
What follows is first a few are a few funny jokes truck we found that are actually funny, and we'll be back with some general conduct of jokes and auto jokes.
A grizzled old truck driver was eating at a truck stop when three bikers from hell Angels walked in the first biker walked to the old man, pushed his cigarette into the pie of the old man, then took a seat at the counter .
A moment later, the second biker walked to the old man spat in milk the old man as he took a seat at the counter.
The third biker walked to the old man, shot on the plate of the old man, and then he took a seat at the counter.
Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the dinner.
Shortly after, one of the bikers said to the waitress, Hm, that old fool, he was not much of a man he was.
The waitress said, not much of a truck driver is, he just backed his big-rig on three motorcycles and drove off.
A truck with two drivers was had gone through town and was driving on back roads on the way to a slightly larger city when they came to an overpass with a sign that read 11 RELEASE 2.
So they went out and measured their platform It was March 12.
What do you think the trucker passenger asked the driver.
The driver looked around carefully, was in the truck and moved first thin as he says, Well, it's not a cop in sight Let's take a chance.
Yes, like most other types of humor car humor relies on the element of surprise Here's another couple of surprisingly funny car jokes.
A policeman pulls a driver for swerving in and out of lanes on the highway, he said the guy to blow a breath into a breathalyzer.
Because I am asthmatic, very seriously affected that I could get an asthma attack if I blow into the tube.
Okay, we'll just get a blood sample down to the station.
Because I am a hemophiliac If I give blood I could die.
Alright then, just steps from the car and walk this white line.
Jill's car was old and unreliable and called John for a ride every time he broke down one day John is yet another of those calls.
My brakes went out, Jill says you can pick me up.
And now we approach the end of this car jokes and collection of automotive humor We hope you had fun.
For the grand finale, we'll show you one of those situations that are so realistic you can almost see right before your inner eye.
A man saw flashing red and blue lights in his rear view mirror pulls on the side of the road Shortly after his arrival at a stop, a police officer approaches the car.
Officer You were going 75 miles per hour in 55 mile an hour zone, I'm afraid I'll have you ticket.
Wife Oh, Harry You were going at least 80 Man gives woman dirty look.
Officer, I will also give you a ticket for your broken tail light.
Broken Man taillight I did not know a broken taillight.
Wife Oh Harry, you've known about this tail light for weeks The man gives his wife a dirty look another.
Officer, I will also give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.
Oh man, I just took when you walk to the car.
The man turns to his wife and shout, For Cryin out loud, can not you just shut up.
The officer turns to the woman and asks, Ma am, your husband to talk to you that way all the time.
And if the woman said, No officer only when he's drunk.
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